Cruise Ship Coincidence
by SageK
Summary: Prompt: Future fic slightly AU (no Klaine engagement or Samcedes crap, or they broke up already). During a cruise, Kurt and Rachel bump into newlywed Blaine and Sam, who are on their honeymoon after haven't saw them in years. Written for lauraperfectinsanity's birthday :) Happy Birthday, Laura!


"How is this even possible? Shouldn't they be tired by now?"

"I have no idea, but this has to stop. I need my beauty sleep!" Rachel said, stomping her foot and glaring at the wall that separated the stateroom she and Kurt were sharing from the room next door. The occupants of said room were…quite enthusiastic about their amorous activities. Sure, there was one of the tacky "Just Married" signs on the door (the cruise ship stuck them on the rooms of newlyweds), but really, this was getting to be a distraction. "How can we be expected to work under these conditions?"

Over the past few years, she and Kurt had both found some success on Broadway and were recently approached by a luxury cruise line to perform aboard. Sure, it wasn't exactly their usual gig, but they thought of it as a vacation (especially since they had been able to get a stateroom in the deal) and the first night's show had been a rousing success. Giddy on a bit of bubbly, they had returned to their room, only to discover they were rooming next to a pair of overzealous rabbits.

The moaning, giggling, thumping and other associated sex noises had stopped after an hour…but had picked up again after a brief, 30 minute respite. Given that his bed was against the wall, Kurt was none too pleased about this and he couldn't ignore the sounds despite trying to do so.

Tossing his blanket aside, Kurt slid his feet into his L.B. Evans 'Aristocrat' scuffs and straightened his Turkish linen pajamas before stalking to the door, Rachel on his heels. They both wore nighttime face masks (moisturizing and avoiding fine lines were a must), but neither took the time to wipe them off, as they intended to return to their beds for some much deserves slumber after dealing with the horny menaces next door.

Kurt stopped before the garishly adorned door and, with an annoyed huff, raised his fist to pound on it. From here, the sounds weren't very audible, but he could still tell when they stopped, possibly startled by his knocking. Hands planted on his hips, Kurt tapped his toe, Rachel mirroring his angry stance as they waited a full minute for the door on the lock to click.

Before the door even opened, Kurt launched into his complaint. "Look, I understand this all must be very exciting for you, the cruise, getting married, and all, but really….Sam?"

Standing in the open doorway, sweaty and shirtless, cheeks flushed and hair rumpled, was Sam Evans. Neither Kurt nor Rachel had seen the blond for years (not in person anyway), but…the years had definitely been kind to him. Which, given that he'd started modeling again at some point, made sense. Pictures of him were impossible to miss, plastered on billboards around New York. After the first one had gone up, Rachel had tried to contact him, only to find that his email and phone number had changed and his Facebook was private. After Kurt and Blaine's final break up, they had severed all ties with the friends who seemed to be on Blaine's side, not needing that kind of negativity in their lives, so they really hadn't been able to get in touch with him and were soon distracted by the events in their own lives.

Blue green eyes blinked at them, a startled, slightly confused look of Sam's face. It was one they were quite familiar with. "Kurt? Rachel? What are you guys doing here?" he asked, leaning on the door.

"The Captain is such a big fan of ours that he personally asked us to perform on this cruise," Rachel said, stepping in front of Kurt and smiling up at Sam, no longer seeming mad. "We were even given the stateroom next door. Performers usually have to stay on the crew deck, but we're not the average entertainment and the captain recognized that. What on Earth are you doing here?"

Really?

"I'm on my honeymoon," Sam said, tapping the 'Just Married' sign and wiggling his ring finger, which yes, had a ring on it. "Um, I'd kinda like to get back to…."

"You got married?" Kurt interrupted. "Mercedes didn't say anything! Oh my Gaga, where is she!? Mercedes, get out here!"

Sam gave him a funny look. "I didn't marry Mercedes. We haven't talked in years. Why would you assume…"

"But Samcedes is endgame," Rachel said, looking at him in shock. "Some couples are just meant to be."

"Some are, some aren't," another voice interrupted…a familiar, male voice…..

A hand landed on Sam's waist and Blaine ducked under his arm, equally rumpled and shirtless, platinum wedding band gleaming on his left hand. He looked good, even more handsome than he had the last time Kurt had seen him. Sam grinned down at him, pressing a kiss to Blaine's temple as the smaller man said, "Nice to see you both, but I'm going to steal my husband back now…."

"Oh no you don't!" Kurt said, hand shooting out to hold the door open. "What is the meaning of this? Is it some kind of joke? Or a desperate ploy to make me jealous?"

Sam and Blaine glanced at each other, confusion clear on their faces. "What?" Blaine asked, in a baffled tone. "You being her is a complete shock, so no, none of those things you just suggested!"

"Kurt," Rachel murmured, tugging on his arms. "If you two could just keep it down…the walls aren't very…."

"Oh, sure, you didn't know! That's why you've got your straight best friend pretending to be your husband," Kurt said, eyes rolling. How stupid did Blaine think he was?

"I'm not straight," Sam protested and Kurt poked a finger at him.

"You told Quinn you weren't gay in high school, so you're straight!" Kurt said triumphantly, nodding for emphasis.

Eyes narrowed, Sam said, "I'm bisexual."

Ignoring Rachel's insistent tugging, Kurt sniffed. "No such thing."

"Well, I'm glad Sam never got that memo, cuz I want to go back to having incredible honeymoon sex with my husband," Blaine snapped, slamming the door in Kurt's face.

"How dare he!" Kurt snapped, turning to Rachel. "Can you believe that?!"

She shook her head and led him back to their room. Thankfully, if was still quiet from the room next door and they settled in to get some much needed sleep.

At least for the next couple of hours, before the thumping and moaning started up again. Pulling a pillow over his head, Kurt huffed in annoyance. Life was so unfair!


End file.
